Dude…what is up with the smug chicks on YouTube making tutorial videos that move at the speed of light?

Slow it down you daft cows! I’m a bit dim, I’ve been drinking, and your weaving like Charlotte in the effing web is not increasing the likelihood of this cotton turning into anything a baby could utilize!

Screw it. I’m going to bed. It’s 1am and I have no idea what I’ve just done for the past 2 1/2 hours. I don’t even think this actual stitch…it’s like pig latin. All backwards and scarcely functional in society.

FML…